All humans have it, it comes from our childhood experiences. Here’s the truth: open relationships push on what we therapists call the attachment system. But more importantly, we’ve got to talk about “How do we process the issues of feeling hurt?”
#Gay men video blog how to
Yes, we have to talk about with whom, when, how, what, those kinds of nuts and bolts decisions about how to have an open relationship. Now, that’s not so easy, right? As men, we’re socialized not to talk too much about our most vulnerable feelings, but this is an essential aspect of any open relationship. The number one thing you’re going to have to get good at, when you’re in an open relationship, is having conversations about your feelings. You get to have what you want when it comes to this big decision. The data shows that there are about half of you that want it and half of you don’t. I’m noticing that people who want to close relationships sometimes feel like they can’t have that anymore, that it’s no longer cool. The data shows, if you want open, if you want closed, both are available to you. If you live in a big city on the coasts, in the United States, you may be under the impression that everyone’s in an open relationship. The data shows us that about half of gay men in relationships are in open relationships, and half are in closed relationships.
So, how can you make an open relationship a success? This is probably the number one issue we deal with here at the Gay Therapy Center.
Gay Open Relationships: What Works? How can you have a successful open relationship?